Farewell to a Dear Friend
Vietnam veterans lost one of their biggest advocates on Tuesday.
Carol Haberchak of Pittsburgh, Penn. passed away. She was 65.
For the last three years, she sought out photos of the fallen heroes whose names are etched on the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington, D.C. She submitted those photos to VVMF to ensure their faces and their stories would never be forgotten.
She began her efforts three years ago when she discovered VVMF’s Virtual Wall while searching for Warren Muhr’s final resting place.
Warren was her first love and was killed in action in Vietnam.
They were introduced
by a friend in 1966 while he was training at Fort Lewis, Wash. They’re relationship grew through letters and phone calls, as they were long distance.
One of his first letters to her read, “Do you believe in love at first write?”
His letters were sweet and sincere, with a wonderful sense of humor. He regarded her as an angel in his life and an inspiration. They quickly fell in love.
Warren turned 21 on January 21, 1967. On Feb. 26, 1967, he was killed by machine gun fire while protecting the front lines in Vietnam.
Carol found out about his death much too late to pay her respects and felt helpless.
Years later, she found his final resting place in Chicago, Ill. and made several trips to his graveside. It was then that she made it her mission to find photos for as many fallen Vietnam heroes as she could and post them to the Virtual Wall. She believed so fervently in honoring Warren and Vietnam veterans that she donated funds to help build the Education Center at The Wall and made VVMF a major beneficiary in her will.
Her friend Cheryl Weitzel notified VVMF of Carol’s passing and said, “She touched the lives of so many with her faithfulness and dedication to the Vietnam veterans, and she uploaded pictures for more than 300 heroes who were faceless.”
Carol told VVMF several years ago that while her time with Warren was short, he had the greatest influence on her life. Warren inspired her to do all she could to support and honor veterans.
“Carol was one in a million. She taught me a very profound lesson,” said Jan C. Scruggs, VVMF’s founder and president. “All loses are survivable—whether it’s a good friend or a first love—it’s what we do after that loss, to take something painful and channel it into something meaningful, is truly special.”
VVMF is forever grateful to Carol for her dedication and support to veterans and the effort to build the Education Center at The Wall. We are saddened by her passing and also the realization that she won’t be standing with us when the center is completed.
May you REST IN PEACE, beloved one. You will be missed.
Rest in Peace Carol. Thanks for the kind words for my buddies Your e-mails were always special to me.
I am so shocked and sad to hear this news. Carol would write to me now and then to ask if I could help her in her quest of finding photos. I always looked forward to her charming emails and was amazed at her dedication to the men on the Wall. She loved them all, but especially Warren. I hope she will meet him again and rest happily with him.
Carol had a passion for Vietnam veterans that was an inspiration to many — her kindness and desire to do the right thing was unsurpassed. I provided her several pictures of veterans from the McKeesport, Pa., area and then we soon developed a friendship. I would send her copies of VIETNAM magazine and she would tell me that it was read from cover to cover.
I regret we never were able to meet for lunch as we planned — she was often just too consumed in her work to have a picture of every veteran killed in action on the Wall.
Farewell my friend, may you rest in peace.
Carol:
Our short time together has enriched my soul and spirit. Even though I played but a small role in helping you search out photos, my most cherished memory of you will forever be that of Larry, a big burly member of the Marine Corps League, with tears in his eyes reaching out to you for a hug after you spoke to our group at a fundraiser. Larry was a Vietnam Marine, and was truly touched, as were all who met you, by your story. Our chairman, another Vietnam Marine, told me privately that he was happy I gave the introduction, as he likely would not have gotten through your story.
I read that you wished no memorial. Sorry, Carol, but there’s a huge black granite wall in Washington, and over 58,000 souls waiting at Heaven’s Gate for you. In your own way you are no less a hero and a Patriot than those who gave all to our Republic. I shall miss you, I shall pray for you, and I will ask for your guidance from above. Know that every group that I’m associated with is going to read of your passing, and your name will be read aloud at our October function. I’m sure that Larry will shed a tear for you, and I hope you’ll forgive him a moment of sadness.
This is a very sad day for all of us, Carol was very good at what she was doing for the Ed, Center. I talk to her a lot and she help me get started on collleting photos in Philadelphia Pa. I will miss her. I will carrie on our mission we have a long road a head.
Robert Patrone
U S. Army Retired
Carol, I met you just a few months ago but came to know that you were a true friend to those who have worn the uniforms of our Nation’s military. Thank you for your service to our Nation’s Hero’s
God Bless and keep you Carol….you were such an angel and champion of the fallen heroes.
Good by Carol I will be thinking of you Saturday August 4th at the Beaver Car show and at every car show that I show our car the 1979 Lincoln Mark v
Mr. James — do you know what was the cause of Carol’s death? Carol and I exchanged emails often and she never alluded to any illness. We veterans truly have lost a friend.
Donn, I know we are all “wondering”, but it’s best to just let her rest. She was so involved with this project and it may just have become too overwhelming for her, and her love for Warren was all-consuming. I prefer to think that she died of a broken heart that will soon be healed as she rejoins him…
Mary:
I shared an e-mail with a friend of Carol’s that she spoke of frequently. In it I said:
Art:
I only knew Carol for a short time. As I had written to the folks on Danielle’s e-mail list, our meeting was purely serendipitous—or was it? I recall a line from one of my favorite movies, Fried Green Tomatoes, where the character Idgie Threadgoode says to Ruth’s son: “See, now is a time for courage. I guess you already know that there are angels masquerading as people walking around this planet and your mom was the bravest one of those.” Sipsey, in the same movie, comforts Idgie by telling her “Ruth was a lady, and a lady always knows when to leave”.
I have no direct knowledge of any specific illness, and I truly do prefer to think that Carol’s tour of duty as an angel, masquerading as a person, was over, and her orders came through to return to her home Duty Station. Carol and I shared some real two boxes of Kleenex e-mails. She was and is an inspiration–and one of a very few angels I have met.
John, What you wrote is lovely and true. I never met Carol personally, we were supposed to have lunch some day, but you know how that goes. We were both busy with “stuff”. You always think there will be time later, but sometimes life makes other decisions. I’ll always remember her dedication to our heroes of the Vietnam War and her open friendliness to all. She was a very special lady.
I am very glad my cousin did something good. I am very sad that she felt she had to leave her family out of her lose of life… Her sister & brother and God Daughter is Heart broken that no one notified them….
My condolences to your family — Carol and I worked together to find pictures of veterans who were killed in action — she was a woman of honor and passion. Please do not harbor any hard feelings towards her — she must have had her own justification. May she Rest In PEACE.
Donn Nemchick
Pittsburgh, PA
Justification. only God knows this answer…